Marine Combat Veteran Quotes

Nick comes up with amazingly, hilarious quotes. On his first day of classes, I asked him how it went. He told me that he wished a could still carry an M16 around with him everywhere. He also parks his car in a satellite lot about a mile away from school because it's free. He told me he goes on a one mile patrol every day to and from school. And recently, he told me he figure out why he enjoys walking the one mile to school every day instead of taking the shuttle...because it reminds him of Iraq! It's in a run down part of Lowell, when it rains you see trash and dirty water running into the sewers, he comes to a road block at one point with jersey barriers, and most of the people he sees along his "patrol" are of different ethnicity's. I couldn't stop laughing when he told me this. I cherish these small quotes he comes up with. It lets me into a little part of his world, and plus it just pits a smile on my face. I <3 my OIF combat veteran!

I was driving home from work the other day, and the radio station I was listening to was having a poll. The poll was whether long distance relationships really work. The majority of people who called in said no, of course not. It’s hard to trust someone when they’re so far away. Communication is hard. You never get to see each other. And on and on and blah blah blah. This pissed me off. My relationship is proof that long distance relationships can and do work. I was in a long distance relationship for well over 2 years while Nick was in NC and I was still living in MA. That even spanned 7 month deployments over seas to Iraq! And we made it work. As long as you trust each other 100% and are both willing to make it work, a long distance relationship will work. You just need to want it enough.

The typical military relationship is usually a long distance relationship at some point or another. You’re apart from each other while they’re in boot camp or basic training, which is 3 months long. Then you’re apart while they’re in their MOS school which is another 3 months long. That’s at least 6 months apart. And only if you get married do you get to move to where they’re stationed. If you’re not married, usually the girlfriend stays back where they grew up. And even if you are married and live in the same place, you’re apart during training for deployments, and then during the actually deployment. Yet military relationships work. One of my best friends has spent her entire relationship away from her fiancée up until now. And they’ve made it work. Plenty of girls I have met through the military have been in this situation. I don’t know. Maybe our relationships are stronger than the typical civilian relationship. Distance is hard. It’s not for the weak. But in my opinion, it also creates a stronger bond.

And we are officially homeowners! We had our closing Thursday afternoon, and it went on record Friday morning. So, it’s official! We also didn’t have to pay any money at closing, since had asked for $5,000 from the seller. We actually got money back, since the VA Funding Fee was waived due to Nick being a disabled veteran.  We couldn’t be any happier or more excited about our purchase. I can’t wait to move in and start decorating! I already have so many ideas in my head! We bought a queen size bob-o-pedic last night as well as a couch for our living room. I ordered an electric fireplace for our living room today, and I'm about to go to Bed Beth and Beyond! It feels so good to have my own piece of property. And so adult! I’ll see how I feel on November 1^st when I have to make that first mortgage payment ;)

No Matter Where I live....

...I'm always missing someone.

And it fucking sucks,

When I lived in North Carolina, I was constantly missing home, my friends, my family, the Red Sox, and New England in general. We were always missing out on weddings, birthdays, and just random family get togethers. It was really hard on me. When we found out we would be leaving NC to come back home, it almost seemed too good to be true. Although I was sad to be leaving NC behind, I was finally going home again.

Right after we got back to Massachusetts, I kept missing NC and the Marine Corps. Every day something reminded me of that life, and I would be sad and miss it. This went on until I got my job at W.B. Mason. Then we started looking for a house, and I never had that feeling of nostalgia or missing that life. I was too bust to notice, or care really.

Then yesterday I was hit with an overwhelming feeling of missing NC and the Marine Corps. It started with a morning conversation with a friend down there, and it made me realize how much I missed living across the parking lot from her. It was so nice to have a friend so close, to just hang out with, make dinners with, and just talk to, And then the conversation ended with her saying she was headed to the beach with 2 of my other friends that live there. It made me miss hanging out with those 2 girls, and the beach in NC. Then I went to WalMart to pick up 2 prescriptions yesterday, and they were $20 each. Gone are the days of TriCare and $3 prescriptions. And then at dinner, the conversation went towards 401k and savings for the future. And it made me sad to think about how Nick was going to go career with the Marine Corps and get that sweet Military pension. I guess I’m just always going to miss that part of my life. It was a brief part of my life, but it was a huge part of it with a huge impact. Plus, as the story goes with military lives and friends, everyone ends up moving away anyways. Some of my best friends that I’ve made through the military live in Florida and Michigan now. So, regardless of where I live, someone I care about will always be in another place, and I will always be missing someone.

And the good news for today is…we should be closing on our house Wednesday! That is one of the BIG perks of moving back home and staying in one place permanently. I finally get to be a home owner! It’s going to be a great feeling when those keys are handed to us Wednesday afternoon :) I can’t wait!!!!

Today is POW/MIA recognition Day. Thank you to all that have served, who do serve, and have made the ultimate sacrifice for this country. This goes out to those who were KIA. May they rest in peace.

And next, I'm going to add a little insight to my life, and the life as a military spouse. Enjoy :)

We don’t have ranks. We don’t have badges. We don’t fight fires, chase bad guys. We are not heroes. We carry no weapons. We do not drive government vehicles.

We are a hidden society, living amongst you. We serve you food. We wash your laundry. We answer your phone calls. We are not hidden at all. What we are is only known to those who are us. We are those who wait months. Years. All for a phone call. We wait for letters. E-mails. Texts. The presence of those we yearn to smell again. We are always remembering. Always thinking. Always fighting. We never forget. We carry our hearts on our sleeves for fear that if we can’t see our emotions, they’ll disappear into the evening wind. We do not mourn. We cry. We weep. We sob. We fight. We never forget the emptiness in our hearts that we wait to be filled in time’s come. We are the women who fight for our men who fight for our nation. We do not share families. We do not share leases. What we share is beyond comprehension, beyond what words can say. We stand tall and fight hard. We have nothing to fear but fear itself, and that is our greatest fear of all. What we do and who we are is everything you wish you were. Everything you wish you weren’t.

We entered this society not knowing if we would make it out alive. But we fight, and we fight hard. We fight every day. We fight every second of every minute of every hour of every day for years. We don’t know when we will stop fighting. We just keep fighting.

This is our tale of our wars.

There is much to be said of a Marine spouse. Some of us entered these relationships knowing that we would be facing a difficult task in our future. Some of us entered blindly, knowing of the existing fight, but not knowing what it means until it’s too late, until we look to our shoulder and see the blue cord hanging from the threads of our hearts. Some of us entered these relationships before the war, before the fight. We supported, and we were proud. We welcomed our PFCs home with open arms, not realizing that those arms would soon be empty. Some of have been at this for days. Some of us for weeks, and for our veterans, years. We have lost many women to this war, for it takes a strong heart and a willingness to fight and stay alive. We support each other when a soldier returns home to the one he missed most, yet we are jealous, because we want our soldiers home too.

I am here to share with you our stories of our lives, as true as we can be. Why? Because we do not live a fairytale by any means. We stand with our backs straight and our eyes forward for we are proud of what we wait for.

This pride is what we hold dear, because when you’re standing behind enemy lines, the pride that you carry inside is what pushes you through.

Things That Irritate Me

So today’s blog is about some of the things that irritate me! Cuz so many things in life do. Most people don’t want to listen to me bitch about them…except for Nick, God Bless him. But my blog is a safe place to bitch. If you don’t like it, don’t read it! J

The first thing that irritates me: People who don’t speak English. You’re in fucking America! Learn the language! If I decided to move to your country because I felt like it would give me a better life, I would learn to speak your language! I should not have to press 1 for English, or struggle to understand you because you haven’t taken then time to learn the language of the country you’re living in. This has become even more of an issue for me over the last few months since I started my job. Apparently, everyone who works in Accounts Payable doesn’t speak English. It’s wicked frustrating! Some foreign bitch who barely spoke English asked me today how to spell my name. Amy? Really? It’s not that fucking hard!

Another thing that irritates me: This goes along with the speaking English thing. I hate when I call somewhere and the call center is in freaking India! I called Dish Network this morning, and like always, I got an Indian Customer Service Rep. It’s not fair to me to be speaking to someone who barely speaks English, and it’s not fair to Americans! The unemployment rate is at an all time high, and people are struggling to find jobs. These people would GLADLY take a job in a call center if it were offered to them. Instead we contract these things out to India? Not fucking cool.

Driving irritates me. Every time Nick and I go out, I make him drive because driving pisses me off so badly. I was merging onto I-95 yesterday on my way home from work, and some asshole had the nerve to beep at me because I merged on in front of him. Oh, geee, I’m sorry sir. Was I not supposed to merge onto the highway? I’m SO sorry I cut in front of you, so now you’re going to make it home 2 seconds after you should have. Fuck you. We’re all trying to get somewhere, ass.

People in general irritate me. I have this girl on my facebook who thinks her life is so god damn perfect, and she goes as far as to call herself a princess and admits that she gets whatever she wants, Ummm hello, newsflash, life doesn’t revolve around you! And I just find more and more people just care about themselves, and don’t give a shit about anyone else. Maybe I’m just sensitive, or maybe it’s because I almost always put other people first. I don’t know. But it really bothers me. I could delete this bitch off my facebook, but 1) It’s pretty good entertainment to have her on there most of the time and 2) I honestly don’t know how to delete someone off facebook.

I also hate when guys in the military go around bragging about the “shit they did and saw” over seas. It’s annoying. I can guarantee the shit they’re running their mouth about isn’t true. If you really saw it, and you really experienced it, you don’t talk about it. Why would you want to talk about watching civilians die? Or your buddies dying? Or about the missions you did? To sound cool? It pisses me off. Nick NEVER talks about his deployments. He hates to. I don’t even know much about them, and I’m the closest person to him. He doesn’t share it with anyone. He said the only people that know what really went on are the guys that were there beside him. No one else needs to know the horror of what he’s seen, the nightmare he’s had to live, and the demons he has to live with now. If you’ve really been through it, you would feel the same way. I also hate when guys claim they have PTSD when they really don’t. They claim it to try and get money out of the VA for disability. I feel like it’s spitting in my husbands face, as well as any another combat vet that has PTSD.

And that leads me to another thing that irritates me which is something that is very near and dear to my heart. I hate, Hate, HATE when people compare Iraq and Afghanistan. They are 2 totally different wars. And I hate when people act like Afghanistan is a worse war to be involved in that Iraq. First of all, war is war, and it sucks to be involved period. Second of all, you just can’t compare the two! And people so easily forget we were just involved in Iraq in a heavy combat role just a year ago! It’s funny, when I was a sleep tech in 2008 during Nick’s 2^nd deployment, Iraq was all over the news, and all anyone knew about. I would make small talk with my patients, and bring up the fact that my boyfriend was in the Marine Corps. So they would ask questions about if he’s deployed, and blah blah blah. We would talk about the war and how we shouldn’t be there and all the same crap, and then I would bring up Afghanistan and people would look at me like I had 5 heads. Afghanistan? We’re there? I would always say yes, we have troops there now, that’s where Al Qaeda is after all. And then we would move onto a new subject. Now, people seem to forget we were ever in Iraq. I now know how those poor wives must have felt for the 7 years we were in Iraq. No one gave their husbands any recognition. I feel like what my husband did is forgotten. Iraq was a HUGE deal. We were there for over 7 years! Thousands of men and women died, including one Nick’s best friends. Thousands more have been injured. No one should EVER discredit what those men and women did over there. If your husband has never been to Iraq, don’t pass judgment. Don’t say the conditions in Afghanistan are worse than Iraq. Iraq is also a third world country, with no running water, with temps that get to be over 120 degrees. It was still a war with insurgents ready to kill at anytime. Don’t ever try to say Nick’s deployments were easy. He received his Combat Action Ribbon his first deployment (so obviously combat was involved) and he and his squad were blown up on his second deployment earning him a Purple Heart as well as a Navy and Marine Achievement Medal with Valor. I don’t think he would have received any of those things if there hadn’t been combat. It was best said by a facebook group we both joined once that said “Have you ever been to Iraq? No? Fuck you then, you don’t know shit.” And it’s true. Don’t pass judgment if you don’t know. There’s a reason our troops were sent to Iraq over Afghanistan for so many years, and that’s because it was the hot spot. My husband happened to join during a time when Iraq was the hot spot, and he got sent there twice. Not like he asked or anything. So girls, next time you’re about to talk about Afghanistan like it’s so much more bad ass, think about who your audience is. My husband takes great pride in what he did. His unit accomplished great things in Iraq. Look them up: 3^rd Battalion, 6^th Marines. They’re pretty bad ass J

To end this on a happy note, we got bank commitment on the house Monday!!! It’s all coming together. September 30^th is right around the corner!!! Eeeeekkk!!!

This one goes out to my girls...

They are always there for me, no questions asked. It is amazing to have such a great network of people to go to whenever I need it. Whether I need a hug, a shoulder to dry on, someone to vent to, or to make me laugh, I know I can count on them. I’m pretty lucky to have such amazing friends. Not everyone gets that lucky in life.

The first shout out goes to my military girls. No one understands me like they do. Only they know the strain put on a relationship by distance. Only they know the agonizing, heart wrenching pain of watching the man you love most in this world walk away from you to get on a bus that will take him away from you for 7 months (or more!) to a war ridden country. Only they understand the trials and tribulations a deployment can bring. They understand the fear that you may never see your loved one again, and the pain you feel at night as you lay alone in bed, crying yourself to sleep, wondering, hoping, and praying that he is safe and God is watching over him. They understand how you HAVE to be strong, whether you like it or not, during a deployment. Even when the world seems to kick you down repeatedly, you need to remain strong on the outside, even though you’re probably freaking out on the inside. They also understand the feeling of independence you gain from a deployment, and how amazing it feels to know you can do so many things on your own like mow the lawn, or get the car fixed, keep the house going, fix random things, etc. They understand what it’s like to be married to a man who has answered the call to serve his country, and that he has so much pride in what he does, and that the military is his mistress, and the military ALWAYS comes first….that bitch gets WAY too much attention! They also understand how important the friendships are in the military, and they are always there for you no matter what. BECAUSE they understand. Military girls know we get through this life because of each other. And they haven’t gone anywhere since I’ve moved away, or since they have moved away. Anytime I need someone to understand the military aspect of my life, they’re there for me without questions asked. Especially those who know what it’s like to live with someone who had PTSD and a TBI. They still understand me like no other. Because I will forever be a Marine Corps Wife. If the saying is true “Once a Marine, always a Marine,” then it must be the same for the wives. “Once a Marine Corps Wife, Always a Marine Corps Wife.” So to all my military girls….whether you’re a gf, a fiancée, a wife, or former gf/fiancée/wife…thank you. You are the strongest and most amazing girls I know. Thanks for being the best friends I can ask for.

I of course can’t leave out my girls from home. They know the part of me that isn’t military. They know me from before I lived the military life. And that means so much to me. I have a much longer history with these girls, and they also know me in a way my military girls don’t. And they are physically here in person for me. They are all there for me to listen, even if they don’t understand completely what it is that I’m going through. They are always willing to give a hug, or a shoulder to cry on, and that means more to me than any of them will probably ever know. They were the ones there to support me in person while Nick was deployed. They kept me sane, busy, and feeling loved. And they are just flat out fun to be around. I also have to throw my guy friends into this category, cuz they especially keep me laughing. I seriously have the best group of friends anyone could ask for here at home. We’re always there for each other, and can always count on each other.

I guess you can consider yourself pretty lucky in life when you have a great group of friends to support you and keep you laughing. Thank you to all my wonderful friends. You make my life complete <3

One of my friends on facebook posted a link to another girls blog on her page the other day, and said she was a true inspiration. I clicked on it out of curiosity, to see why this girl was a true inspiration. I proceeded to bawl my eyes out. The girl had just lost her boyfriend in Afghanistan on September 2^nd. She laid him to rest on September 8^th. She is only 21 years old. How can life be so cruel? He was her high school sweetheart, and they were supposed to get married after he returned from his tour in Afghanistan. Now she’s never going to get that. 2 weeks ago they had their whole lives together, and now she has to move on, with a shattered heart. It gives me chills every time I think about it.

The military relationship is a unique one because of that alone. You can become a VERY young widow. And for the most part, we are all way too young to have to deal with that in our lives. The average age of the enlisted is 18-26 years old. No one should have to deal with the loss of their spouse at those ages. When you get married, you expect to live a long and fulfilling life with your spouse. But in most marriages, you’re not sending your spouse off to war. Instead, thousands of spouses have had to lay their significant other to rest at way too young of an age due to war. I have always said that in a military relationship, you love harder then those in civilian relationships, because there is always that chance that your loved one won’t return to you. It is one of the scariest things to think about. I could have easily been this girl. Nick could have very easily been killed on his 2 tours to Iraq. I told him numerous times that if he ever deployed a third time, I didn’t think he would be coming home to me. I feel so close to this girl, even though I don’t know her. The bonds between military wives/gfs/fiancées are one of the strongest you will ever see. We may not know each other personally, but we understand each other 100%. God bless this young lady, as well as her Marine whom is a hero to all of us. May he keep watch over her in Heaven, and God rest his soul.